In my 64 years, I am amazed at how many people I meet who have low self-esteem and suffer from feelings of worthlessness. I include myself in that group, unfortunately. My father was a good provider of the physical needs of his family, but, although he claimed to be a Christian, he failed to show us the love that only comes through the Holy Spirit.
I made a profession of faith at age 13, but I only did it to get my father “off my back.” I did not understand what a profession of faith was, and the two well-meaning men at the youth rally fired scripture verses at me like a machine gun. I just didn’t get it. I got no encouragement from my dad or mother, and my sister and I suffered from dad’s “church-hopping.”
In my college years, I ditched anything that smacked of “religion” and didn’t go to church at all. Fortunately, God sent a strong Christian young lady to me whom I married, and she is still my sweetheart after 41 years! Our son became a Christian at age 8 and he really understood what it was all about. I still did not.
In 2009, I was due to go to Tennessee to teach a college course on World War Two, a hobby of mine. Three days before the trip, I developed a bad case of “nerves”, I couldn’t sleep, and I felt that there was something somewhere in my life that needed attention before I took this trip. This feeling grew in intensity until I became convinced that, if I made the Tennessee trip without resolving this “unknown” issue, I would not return alive.
In tears and in a panic, I called my pastor and begged him to see me right away. We talked for an hour, and he prayed the prayer of salvation with me. I left his office that day 100% surrendered to Christ for the first time. My self-esteem soared, and I have no more feelings of worthlessness. My trip was a success, and I returned home without incident.
My pastor said something that day that I will never forget. He said, “Tony, you’ve been running from God for a lot of years. Today, He caught you!”
In 46 years of work, I’ve had the privilege to work for 13 years in government, 21 years in business, and 12 years in education. This has been a blessing because, even as someone who doubted his own salvation, I was still able to reach people for Christ. I’m living proof that God can indeed use anyone to further His kingdom and bring glory to Himself.
Now that I’m retired, I’m interested in finding new ways to serve Him. People with problems have always seemed to gravitate to me and, with God’s grace and guidance, I can help them. I want to develop this gift and get involved in counseling new believers as well as encouraging the unsaved to make the best decision of their lives . . . coming to know Jesus as their Savior.
Please pray for me that God will open doors in these areas that I’m convinced God wants me involved in. Many thanks!
Tony Chappell
