Good parenting doesn’t guarantee good children. It only assures that our children will have the tremendous advantage of having had a good parent. Think about the God of the Bible. He was a perfect parent. But look at His children. Adam and Eve were raised in the best of environments. Yet they threw it all away, went the way of the snake, and gave birth to a murderer.

Then came Israel, a dearly loved nation who repeatedly and chronically became the incorrigible, rebellious child.

Then came the church, who time after time has given her Father a bad name all over the earth.

Ezekiel the prophet assumed that a good parent can have a child who turns out bad. He also reminded us that a bad parent can have a child who turns out good. He argued long and hard against a deterministic relationship between parent and child (Ezek. 18:1-28).

This “tension of the exception” runs against the grain of what we often expect in parent-child relationships. When we see a child from a good family turn out bad, we are inclined to think that there must have been a dark side of parental neglect somewhere. That might be. But what about the children who come from troubled homes and turn out great? Are we as quick to think that there must have been some redeeming and determining parental virtue that we didn’t see? Or are we inclined to think that the child rose above his roots and decided that he was going to be different?

It is painful enough to bear the concern that loving parents feel for the wellbeing of their children. It is enough to know that we haven’t given our children as much love and patience and wisdom as we wish we had. It is all the more pathetic, therefore, when we are robbed of our peace by wrong thinking. It is regrettable when parents experience false guilt because they believe that if they do the right things their children will always turn out well. The truth is that if we do well, our children will be blessed with a good foundation.