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This week’s Abide comes from the passage in the Our Daily Bread devotional for Monday 22nd April.

This passage has a verse that you’ve probably all heard before – one that’s often used in the context of marriage vows. You know it – “a cord of three strands is not quickly broken” – that one.

When the pastor, or celebrant, conducting a wedding ceremony uses this analogy, it’s pretty commonly accepted that the three strands are the soon to be husband and wife, and God. Together, so long as all three are wound together to form one, singular, cord, they are stronger than any or either of them can be individually. And it’s an inspiring and encouraging image to draw upon for a couple about to embark on their married life – keep yourselves entwined with God, and you’ll be stronger for it.

But there’s more to this passage than just a nice metaphor to share at a Christian wedding. Let’s back up, and look at the entire passage. It’s Ecclesiastes 4:7-12.

Again I saw something meaningless under the sun:

There was a man all alone;
    he had neither son nor brother.
There was no end to his toil,
    yet his eyes were not content with his wealth.
“For whom am I toiling,” he asked,
    “and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?”
This too is meaningless—
    a miserable business!

Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,
    one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
    and has no one to help them up
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
    But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
    two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

King Solomon is the writer of Ecclesiastes – the son of King David, and famously the one who asked God for wisdom when God offered him anything his heart may desire. In this book, he shares his wisdom having studied and explored all that is done under the heavens. And as depressing as it may seem at some level, he declares a lot of things meaningless.

Now in this passage, before you get too excited thinking it’s a call to revolt against corporate overlords, he’s not saying that work, or toil, is meaningless. In fact, in the previous chapter, he goes as far to say that there’s nothing better for people to do than to be happy with what they do – to eat, drink, and find satisfaction in their toil – and that this is the gift of God. So, before you fire off that email of resignation, what Solomon saw in this passage we’re focusing on wasn’t the man’s endless toil – but the fact that he was all alone.

This man works away day after day. There’s no end to his work, and clearly it’s not paying off for him – because it says how even with all the hard work and wealth that he was accumulating, it wasn’t enough for him. Working hard, and being rightly paid for that hard work, wasn’t as satisfying as he thought it would be – and he bemoans the fact that he’s spent all his time working, and depriving himself of any enjoyment. He’s realised that with no one else around, no close people in his life, all of that hard work will eventually amount to nothing – because he’s got no one to share it with.

This is one of those passages that points us to the reality of how God has created us as people – we’ve been created for community. Without other people around us, all we work and strive for is not enough – in fact there is an elusive “wealth” that this man can’t work hard enough to ever achieve – being able to share his wealth with others.

Solomon shows us that two are better than one – for many reasons. If we fall, there’s someone to help us up. If we’re cold and lie down together, we keep warm. If we’re being attacked, two can defend themselves. And Solomon shows us the flip side of this as well – if one falls, and has no one to help them up, it’s pitiful. One person, lying alone in the night, can’t keep warm. A single person being attacked is easily overwhelmed.

Having travelled the length and breadth of his land, the Teacher, as Solomon calls himself, has realised that there is only meaninglessness when you’re alone.

Now this is in no way trying to shame or guilt anyone that is single, or alone. Togetherness doesn’t just have to be a spouse, or a family member. Whether it’s a close friend, a trusted relative – we all need someone else, and we’ve been designed for our lives to involve other people. Just like the saying goes “it takes a village to raise a child”, we all need our own version of a village for our own wellness. We need friends, community, and support in our lives.

And while having that close friend, trusted partner by our sides, travelling through life, there is a way for it to be even stronger, as the Teacher shares right at the end. A cord of three strands.

Just like in Hebrews, where it tells us that when two or more gather in His Name, God is there with them, there is an amazing power and unity in having our village, our community, our partnership, friendship, or marriage with God as a part of it.

So, with that in mind, let’s prayerfully read through verses 9 to 12 of this passage – praying as we go.

Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their labor:

Father, as we go about our lives, help us to see the people around us who we can work with. Show us the people in our circles who we can join with.

If either of them falls down,
    one can help the other up.

Lord, as we go through each day, open our eyes to the needs of those around us. Help us to see those who may need us to help in specific, day-to-day ways.

But pity anyone who falls
    and has no one to help them up

Jesus, help me to see those around me who may not have someone to support them, or travel with them – even if it looks like they’re surrounded by people.

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
    But how can one keep warm alone?

Loving God, thank you for the people in my life who keep me warm, so to speak. Open my eyes to see if there are others who you might be calling me to invest time and relationship in.

Though one may be overpowered,
    two can defend themselves.

Holy Spirit, thank you that you have been given to us by God the Father, so that none of us are ultimately alone.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Loving God, help me to remember that strength comes only when you are a part of each of my relationships. Thank you for your promise that when I meet with someone in Your Name, You are there with us.

Amen.

So this week, try keeping these verses and prayers in your mind. Be asking God to open your eyes to those who are your community, or who you might be called to love and support in some way. It could be as simple as an encouraging message, a quick chat to check in on them, or even sharing food together. But let’s learn from the Teacher’s wisdom, and remember that two are better than one.

And three is even better still.