A friend of mine—okay, it was my counselor—drew a stick figure on a sheet of paper. She labeled this the “private” self. Then she drew an outline around the figure, about a half-inch larger, and named it the “public” self. The difference between the two figures, between the private and public selves, represents the degree to which we have integrity.

I paused at her lesson and wondered, Am I the same person in public that I am in private? Do I have integrity?

Paul wrote letters to the church in Corinth, weaving love and discipline into his admonitions to be like Jesus.…